I've been replaying The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina Of Time recently, and I'm genuinely surprised at how well most of it has held up so far. Yes, the first 3D Zelda is a critically acclaimed masterpiece. But it's also over two decades old. I certainly can't fault it for being a little creaky in places, can I?
Except, it's not actually that creaky at all. The combat hasn't aged brilliantly, and the empty Hyrule Field is far less impressive than it used to be, but for the most part this has proved to be the epic Zelda adventure I always remembered it to be.
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Take a look at some of our favourite Zelda memories below! The Water Temple does not feature.
So filled with goodwill, was I in fact, that I started to tell myself that even the game's very worst dungeon - the dreaded Water Temple - probably wasn't as bad as I recalled. Maybe we've all exaggerated how bad it was, I thought to myself.
Nope. The Legend Of Zelda: Ocarina Of Time's Water Temple is a bad place for bad people. If anything, it's worse than I remember. It's a deep-blue labyrinth of endless corridors and abject watery misery. It is where dreams and hope go to die. Like an underwater Ikea, but without a crap boss at the end instead of a hotdog.
I should clarify at this point that I'm playing Ocarina Of Time 3D, the 3DS remake, which does at least rectify one of the Water Temple's worst crimes. Instead of having to jump into the gear menu to equip/unequip the Iron Boots constantly, I can simply tap a button on the touchscreen to take them on and off with zero trouble. That is undoubtedly a huge improvement. But it doesn't change the fact that the temple itself was clearly designed by a serial killer.
Everything I remember hating about the Water Temple is somehow worse in 2021. It's like the layout dungeon is actively designed to trick you into making mistakes, forcing you to backtrack. On no less than three occasions, I fought my way down a narrow series of one-way corridors filled with irritating hopping enemies, water-based puzzles, and deadly traps, only to discover a locked door at the other end. Did I have the key? I did not.
Good Zelda dungeons have a logical flow to them. They're not linear, obviously, but unless you really haven't been paying attention it's very rare that you'll forge ahead down a path with an obstacle you can't overcome yet - be that a locked door or a puzzle you can't solve until you've found the dungeon's item.
The Water Temple has no interest in guiding the player anywhere. All three floors contain branching and often entirely unconnected paths, and the map provides absolutely no indication as to whether there's an insurmountable obstacle at the end. The only way to know if you don't have the means to continue on is to head down one of these paths - at which point you then have to stagger all the way back, look for the item or key you do need, then make your way back to the place you were previously trying to get to. It's farcical.
I'm also fully aware that backtracking is totally required in all Zelda dungeons and that there's nothing wrong with having to thoroughly explore every room. The issue with the Water Temple, as I'm sure you remember, is that certain rooms are inaccessible depending on the level of the water. This turns backtracking from a bit of a pain into an excruciating chore that makes me want to eat my own hands in frustration.
There are no less than three water levels, which can only be changed by heading to one of three corresponding areas and playing Zelda's Lullaby on the Ocarina, which in itself takes about half a minute if we factor in physically playing it and then watching the cutscene. 30 seconds might not sound like much, but when you consider that you'll be changing the water levels at least four or five times - assuming you don't get lost - it adds up.
All of this means that if you missed a certain room or have discovered a key is on another floor, you have to travel to the correct point to raise or lower the water as needed before you can even explore the area you need to explore. It's backtracking within backtracking. It doesn't help that almost every room you have to go in and out of is full of irritating enemies and fiddly traps that can only be overcome by using the Hookshot.
If you don't know exactly where you're going - which I didn't because it's been years - the Water Temple is completely and utterly nightmarish. I know you're probably all-too aware of this, but consider this my warning: If you're thinking about replaying Ocarina Of Time, just use a guide for the Water Temple. Seriously, the quicker you get out of that hell, the quicker you can get back to enjoying the rest of the game.
Featured Image Credit: NintendoTopics: GAMING, News, Nintendo, The Legend of Zelda