In before you post something like, "hur hur, slow news day?" Yes. Yes it is. A slow news day is what we're having, today. So thank you for stopping by to at least take a look at these words, because goddamn it's like getting blood out of a stone out there, right now.
So that headline: pretty unlikely, right? Or rather, it would be unlikely if it had any other name but Elon Musk's attached to it. Because the Tesla CEO and SpaceX founder sure likes to say some wacky things, doesn't he. And sometimes, he even does them - like putting a pretty decent PC inside a car, because why the hell not. I get the distinct impression that's the qualifier for anything Elon Musk does: why, the, hell, not.
And what he's now said is, again, straight out of the leftfield, direct from the filing cabinet of the brain marked: sure, why the hell not. As PCGamesN reports, the richest man in the world (as of a few weeks ago, when his infinite wealth stretched out past that of Amazon's Jeff Bezos) wants to make monkeys play video games using their minds.
You know what's definitely cool? This homemade Iron Man costume
Just, take a second. Elon Musk wants to make monkeys play video games using their minds. Still with me? Rich people, am I right?
(There's more to this, of course, and yes I am being slightly facetious because it's a necessary mood when addressing any Musk-related piece. This technology could be amazing, down the line, for disabled people, allowing those who cannot use their hands properly to interact with devices, improving lives around the world.)
Musk gave a speech on the social media platform Clubhouse, during which he talked about a wireless implant that would go inside a monkey's brain, allowing them to ""play mind Pong with each other." To achieve such a thing, he said, would be "really cool".
Would it, Elon? Anyway, back to the science, and Musk's own Neuralink Corporation (he has more pies than fingers, evidently) is actually working on these wireless implants right now. What's more, the company has successfully put an implant into a monkey, having previously done the same with pigs.
The US Department of Agriculture has inspected the Neuralink facility where all of this implanting has been going on, and claims that it's "the nicest monkey facility" they've seen. Human trials are expected to begin soon. So, that's good? Is it? Or are we all living in an episode of Black Mirror that really should have ended by now? I can no longer tell.
In related news, Pong is good, the Tesla Cybertruck is dumb, and that last Grimes album is still in regular rotation here, thanks. What's that? There's a Rave Edition? Am on it.
Featured Image Credit: Instagram (@elonmusk), 20th Century Fox
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