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This Horror Movie Was Written Entirely By Bots And It's A Masterpiece

This Horror Movie Was Written Entirely By Bots And It's A Masterpiece

400,000 hours of horror movies equates to… 45 years.

Imogen Donovan

Imogen Donovan

Mr. Puzzles Wants You To Be Less Alive is the very first of a new genre of horror movies - one written entirely by a bot that's watched 400,000 hours of frightful films. It's an experience.

From Netflix and comedian Keaton Patti, Mr. Puzzles Wants You To Be Less Alive riffs off the staples of a scary movie that you'll know like the back of your hand. It's Halloween and our heroine Jennifer wakes up to find herself hanging above a set of spinning saws. Then, "a puppet with a mask made in hell or Texas" rolls in on a unicycle with three wheels. "How you know my name?" she says in shock as Mr. Puzzles challenges her to become a gamer. "You have a body. Jennifers always have bodies," replies the villain.

I could certainly see Netflix By Bots becoming a series that pokes fun at different genres and their hackneyed tropes, like horse movies where the central character's mother has almost always died off screen and gosh, wouldn't she be proud of you today, Bethany-Anne. Plus, the strange animations and robotic voices turn the script into completely off-the-wall weirdness that simply must be seen and heard to be believed.

Check out this compilation of Resident Evil Village scenes ruined with the addition of Handsome Squidward, Piglet, Mr Bean, and more!


Don't get me wrong, I'm a firm believer that parades should not be rained on. Yet, I think it's unlikely that this has been written by a bot using 400,000 hours of horror movies without any additions or alterations from an actual person. First things first, the fact that there are fully formed and understandable sentences in the script is a giveaway. It would take it ages and ages for a bot to formulate grammatically correct sentence structures because all a bot does is look for the most common words and phrases in the material you give it.

They're clever, but they're not clever enough to make more than one joke about the co-worker or the whales. Mr. Puzzles can't pull the wool over my eyes with his... puzzles. This is why I am not invited to parties any more.

Featured Image Credit: Netflix

Topics: Netflix