I’m going to be real with you, in all my years of life, I’ve never once felt an overwhelming need to own an enormous statue of a turd to proudly display in my home. I don’t think think that’s a particularly hot take, either - I’m not sure how many people would.
If that’s ever been a dream of yours though, your time is now. As PC Gamer reports, toy and model company First 4 Figures has now announced an enormous statue of the Great Mighty Poo from the N64 classic Conker’s Bad Fur Day, which can now serve as a feature piece in your abode. This thing really lives up to its name - although the company hasn’t shared any dimensions, one image which shows the scale of it next to a person proves that it’s a seriously sizeable piece of s**t. This thing is going to need its own dedicated table, or something.
Earlier this year, the iconic N64 game GoldenEye 007 was re-released on Nintendo Switch, Xbox One and Series X/S - take a look at the trailer below.
The statue itself features Conker fighting the Great Mighty Poo - much like the iconic boss fight from the game, the titular squirrel can be seen lobbing a roll of toilet paper into the enemy’s mouth. Unfortunately though, the Great Mighty Poo doesn’t sing in his enormous statue form, which feels like a missed opportunity.
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If for whatever reason you want to get your hands on one of these things, preorders open on 3 August, so there’s just a few more days to wait until you can splash some cash on a pile of poo. It’s not clear how much it’s going to cost - those who register their interest in advance can get $10 off their order, but with no price tag to compare that to, I can’t say if that’s a good deal or not. It costs nothing to get the discount, though, so if you’re interested, then you might as well bag a saving. You can submit your email address for a discount code here.
Featured Image Credit: First 4 Figures, RareTopics: Retro Gaming, Nintendo
